Monday, October 25, 2010

20 days.

20 days of telling Jackson no when he asks for milk after waking up.

14 days (6 of the 20 we were inpatient) of driving to Dallas on empty stomachs.

20 days of walking through those doors and being hit by the hospital smell.

20 days of sitting on the flowered couches and watching cartoons.

20 days of walking him down the long hallway.

20 days of carrying him into the treatment room.

20 days of holding him while the anesthesiologist does his thing.

20 days of feeling his body give in to the medicine.

20 days of laying him down on the table and walking away.

20 days of looking back one last time.

20 days of waiting.

20 days of looking up anxiously every time the door opens, hoping it's over already.

20 days of rushing to the back when it is.

20 days of hearing the pulse ox machine beeping down the hallway.

20 days of sitting in Room 6 while he wakes up.

20 days of listening to his deep sleep sigh.

20 days of Nurse Wendy checking vitals and pushing pressure points.

20 days of seeing him wake up slightly grouchy and irritated.

20 days of a very strong little boy ripping off the pulse ox and bp cuff.

20 days of chugging apple juice.

10 days of Blues Clues stickers. Then he got bored with that.

20 days of radiation. On my 3 year old. How did this happen?


About Day 6 he stopped crying and freaking out when we walked into the treatment room. Happy that it was easier on him but sad that he was so used to something so awful.

He started losing his hair again on Day 11. I will never forget seeing his hair on that white pillow.

He asked me to put him on his bed (the treatment table) on Day 14. I cried in the hallway.


I am thankful for modern medicine.

I am thankful for sweet nurses, efficient techs and knowledgeable doctors.

I am thankful for Chick-fil-A on the way home.

I am thankful for a husband whose job allows him to be there.

I am thankful for DVD players in the car.

I am thankful for a God that carried us through this.

I AM THANKFUL THAT THIS IS OVER.


My kid is way stronger than I will ever be.

He is amazing and awesome and outstanding and wonderful and I LOVE HIM SO MUCH.


Thank you for praying.


For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.
Matthew 18:20



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6 comments:

  1. I can't even imagine.... I hope this is the end of his cancer so that he can get to the business of being a rowdy little boy!

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  2. I am so glad that this hurdle is out of the way for you all. Jackson is such an amazing, stong little guy. XXOO

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  3. I have been praying for you guys and feel honored to have met your little man! Although this journey is "over," I know you have a long battle ahead with getting back to "life." We will continue to keep you all in our thoughts and prayers.

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  4. So happy to hear those 20 days of radiation are over with...Praise God!!! Prayers continue for the rest of Jackson's chemotherapy schedule :)

    Peace be with you,

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  5. Lindsay, I'm new here.
    I came over when you left a comment on my post yesterday and just tried to do a little back reading to catch up on you and Jack.
    I am now sitting at my desk in tears.
    You are an extremely strong woman and you've got a little fighter on your hands!
    What is Jack's current state? Is he in remission?
    Whatever the case, I am praying for you, Jack, and your family.

    You said you are 30 mins. outside of Dallas, where abouts?
    You can email if you'd prefer not to say...
    brandi.laughlin@gmail.com

    So glad I found your blog!

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  6. I'm keeping your sweet Jackson and family in my prayers - always.
    xoRobyn

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